Have you ever found yourself in a place where everything seems to be falling apart, where God feels distant, almost absent, where you are crying out for help and all you hear is silence? Perhaps it is a sudden tragedy, perhaps someone died in your family, someone who was very close to you. Perhaps it is a slow accumulation of loss, or perhaps it is just the weight of living in a broken world finally crushing down on you. And in the middle of it all, you are asking the hardest question a believer can ask: "Where is God?" And if that is where you are right now, this message is for you.

I want you to know something before we even begin. You are not alone in asking that question, believe me. And asking it does not make you a bad Christian.

Welcome to the Pristine Grace podcast. I am your host, Brandon Kraft, and I am thankful you are here with me today. This is a show where I discuss the gospel, Christian living, theology, and Bible subjects, and occasionally I will touch on current events when it seems appropriate or whatever strikes my mood at the time. If you are new here, I would encourage you to subscribe and visit my website at pristinegrace.org.

A bit about myself: I am a Christian writer and speaker. I have been maintaining pristinegrace.org for nearly 30 years. And today I want to talk to you about something that touches every believer at some point. Perhaps you are right there right now. Perhaps you have been there before. Perhaps you will be there someday. Actually, let us just be honest: you will be there someday.

And we are going to talk about those dark seasons when everything falls apart and when God seems nowhere to be found. And I want to say up front that I am not going to try to rush through this. This is not a topic you can handle quickly or glibly. So I would advise you to get comfortable, pour yourself something warm to drink. If you are in Kentucky, you might grab a bourbon. Just kidding. But we are going to take our time with this because it matters. Because I will tell you what, you matter. Because your pain matters. And because I believe with all my heart that there are answers, not easy answers, not answers that will make the pain go away instantly, but answers, there are answers, real answers, true answers, answers that will sustain you even when everything else is stripped away.

So let me start by acknowledging something that needs to be said. When everything falls apart, when everything fails, when tragedy strikes, when loss overwhelms you, it can feel like God has abandoned you, like he has turned his face away, like all those promises you read in Scripture were for someone else, but not for you. And in those moments, well-meaning Christians will often say things that they may not find to be helpful. They will quote Romans 8:28, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." And I love that passage. But well-meaning Christians will sometimes quote that as if that verse somehow makes the pain less real. They will tell you to have more faith. They will tell you to pray harder. To trust more. As if you are suffering because you are doing something wrong.

But here's what I want you to understand. The fact that you're suffering doesn't mean God has abandoned you. The fact that everything is falling apart doesn't mean He's absent. And the fact that you can't see His hand doesn't mean He's not working. Actually, oftentimes, God does His deepest work in the darkest seasons. Now, I know that might sound like an empty comfort, like some sort of spiritual platitude, but I want to show you from Scripture that this is true, that God's people have always walked through these dark valleys, and that God has always been with them, even when they couldn't see Him or feel Him.

Let me start with Job. Because if anyone knew what it meant to have everything fall apart, it was Job. In a single day, he lost his wealth, he lost his servants, he lost his children, and then he lost his health. He was covered in boils from head to foot. He was sitting in ashes, scraping his sores with, get this, a piece of broken pottery. His wife came to him and said, and I can hear the despair in her voice right now, "Curse God and die. Just give up. Just let go. God has clearly abandoned you. So why keep holding on?"

But listen to what Job says in Job chapter 13, verse 15: "Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him." Though He slay me. Even if this kills me, even if I don't make it through this, even if God never gives me an answer, yet will I trust in Him. That's not shallow faith. That's not someone who's never suffered. That's someone who's lost everything, who's in agony, who can't see any way forward. Yet, he still clings to God.

And here's what's remarkable. God never tells Job why he is suffering. He never explains it. He never gives him the closure he is looking for. But God does show up, and God does speak, and God does reveal himself. And when Job encounters God, and really encounters Him, his response in Job chapter 42, verse 5 is this: "I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear, but now mine eye seeth thee. Now mine eye sees thee." The suffering didn't give Job all the answers, but it gave him something better. It gave him God himself.

And then we have the story of David in the Bible. And I love to think about David, a man after God's own heart, anointed as king of Israel, and yet he spent years running for his life from King Saul. Hiding in caves, watching his back, fearing for his safety every single day. And in those dark years of David, he wrote some of the most honest and raw Psalms in all of Scripture.

Listen to Psalm 13, verses 1 and 2. David pens, "How long wilt thou forget me, O Lord? forever? how long wilt thou hide thy face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily? How long shall mine enemy be exalted over me?" How long? That's the cry of someone who is suffering. Someone who can't see the end. Someone who feels forgotten by God. But notice, David is still praying. He is still crying out to God. Even when it feels like God isn't listening, David keeps talking to Him.

And then in verses 5 and 6, David's perspective shifts. Even in the middle of darkness, David remembers God's mercy. He remembers God's salvation. He is trusting even when he can't see. And that's what faith looks like in the dark. It's not pretending everything is fine. It's not denying the pain. It's crying out honestly to God while still clinging to Him.

And I can tell you from my own personal experience that I have been there. I have been there many times in my life, but particularly when I was younger, when I was still unsure about the things of God and did not know a lot about Him. I was dealing with certain pain in my life just as a young adult and was crying out to God. God had brought me to a place where I just wanted to know Him and just wanted to know who He was. And I can remember tears running down my face. I can remember the long nights and just wanting to hear from God and wanting Him to hear my pain and wanting Him to just reveal Himself to me. And God brought me to that point so that I would reach out and reach out to Him in prayer.

And we see this over and over again in the Bible. Consider Jeremiah, the weeping prophet, a man who watched his nation fall apart. He preached for decades to people who would not listen to him. He was thrown into prison. He was thrown into cisterns, basically pools of water, muddy water, I guess. And he suffered constant rejection and persecution.

And in Lamentations chapter 3, Jeremiah pours out his heart. And in verses 1 through 3, they say, "I am the man that hath seen affliction by the rod of his wrath. He hath led me and brought me into darkness, but not into light. Surely he hath turned against me. He hath turned his hand against me all the day." God turned against me. That's how it feels to Jeremiah. And he's a prophet, okay? But he wrote as if God were the enemy. God is the one causing his suffering.

But then, right in the middle of his lament, right in the depths of his despair, Jeremiah says something remarkable. Let's look at Lamentations chapter 3, verses 21 through 23. "This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness."

And I love that hymn, by the way, "Great is Thy Faithfulness." And this I have to recall to my mind because Jeremiah had to intentionally remember it; it does not come naturally when you are in the pit. You have to choose to recall God's character, God's faithfulness, and God's mercy. And notice what he says: "It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed." Even in the suffering, even in the darkness, God's mercy is what is keeping you alive. God's compassion is what is sustaining you.

And He is sovereign. And I know that sounds silly, but it is true. Or what I am about to tell you sounds silly. He is so sovereign that He is keeping your eyeballs held into your eye sockets right now so that you can see this message. You can see my smiling face here on YouTube. And He is also keeping your ears attached to your head so you can hear me through the sermon audio. His mercies are new every morning, even this morning, when you woke up in pain, even this morning when the grief was the first thing you felt, when you remembered your lost loved ones, your lost husband or wife or your children or your parents, even this morning when you did not know how you would make it through another day, His mercies were there, new, fresh, sufficient for today.

"Great is Thy faithfulness." God has not changed. He has not abandoned you. He has not stopped being who He has always been.

Now, I want to pause here and address something because I know some of you are thinking, "Well, that's all well and good, Brandon. Those are beautiful verses. But you don't understand what I'm going through. You don't know how much this hurts. You don't know how dark it is where I am." And you're right. I don't know your specific pain. I don't know your exact circumstances. I have known some believers who have gone through some unbelievably dark times. I've gone through some tough periods myself, but I will have to say that I have not been challenged in the way other believers have had. I've had a pretty good life so far, in terms of trials. And I know trials are coming for me. But I have skated by in life, if you will. I have perfect health. I have a great, great life, got a great family. Most of my loved ones are still with me. I have had some losses there.

But I do know this. I know God knows your exact circumstances. God knows exactly where you are. He knows exactly what you're feeling. And He knows the depth of your pain. He knows. He knows. And more than that, here's where you need to find rest. He cares. He hasn't turned away. He hasn't stopped loving you.

And if you are, you know, here's what I need you to understand if you're in Christ. Your suffering, your suffering is, and as real and painful as it is, it's not punishment. It's not God paying you back for your sins. Because if you're in Christ, all your sins, past, present, and future, they've already been punished. Alright? They've been punished not in you, but they were punished in Christ.

And Isaiah chapter 53, verse 5 says, "But he was wounded for our transgressions. He was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed." He was wounded for our transgressions, not his own, but ours. He was bruised for our iniquities, and the chastisement that brought us peace fell on him. That substitution. Christ took our place. He stood where we should have stood, and he bore what we should have borne.

And Isaiah 53, verse 6 continues, "All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all." The Lord laid on Him the iniquity of us all. Every sin, every failure, every wrong thought, word, and deed of God's people, God took all of it and placed it on Christ, and Christ bore it. He carried it all to the cross, and He suffered for it, and He died for it.

So if you are in Christ, God is not punishing you for your sins. He cannot because He already punished Christ for them. Justice has been satisfied, and the debt has been paid. The penalty has been executed. And what you are experiencing right now is not wrath. It is refining. It is God working all things together for your good to conform you to the image of His Son.

Isaiah chapter 49, verses 15 and 16 says, "Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee on the palms of my hands. Thy walls are continually before me." I will not forget you, he says, even when it feels like everyone else has forgotten. Even when it feels like the whole world has moved on and you are still stuck in your pain. God has not forgotten you. He has engraved you on the palms of his hands. Think about what that means. The hands that were pierced for you. The hands that bled for you. The hands that bore the nails. Your name is written there. Permanently. Indelibly. Forever. You are constantly before Him. He sees you. He knows you. And He has not looked away.

And here is something else I want you to understand. God does not waste suffering. He does not allow pain in your life arbitrarily or carelessly. He has purpose. And He has purposes that we might not see right now. Purposes we might not understand for years, decades even. But purposes nonetheless. Romans chapter 8, verses 28 and 29 tell us, "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose. For whom He did foreknow, He also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of His Son."

Now I know I said earlier that people sometimes throw verse 28 at suffering people carelessly. But look at verse 29; that is what I want you to focus on right now. It says, it tells us what the good is that God is working toward. It is not necessarily comfort. It is not necessarily earthly happiness. It is not necessarily an easy life. The good is conformity to Christ. God's purpose in your suffering is to make you more like Jesus.

And how do you become like Jesus? Well, how did Jesus become our Savior? He became our Savior through suffering, through the cross, through pain, darkness, and feeling forsaken. Hebrews chapter 5 verse 8 says, "Though he were a Son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered." Jesus learned obedience through suffering, and if that was true of the sinless Son of God, how much more will it be true of us? God uses suffering to refine us, to purify us, to strip away the things that we are clinging to instead of Him, and to show us what we are really trusting in.

And I know that is hard. And I know that it does not make the pain less real. But it does mean that the pain now has meaning. It is not random. It is not pointless. God is at work even when you cannot see it.

Peter writes in 1 Peter chapter 1 verses 6 and 7, "wherein ye greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations; that the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ."

Your suffering has a time frame. It will not last forever; I can promise you that. And it might feel endless right now, but you have got to remember that it is just for a season. And the trial of your faith is more precious than gold. Gold has to be refined by fire to become pure, and your faith is being refined in the same way. The fire is hot. The fire is painful, but it is producing something very precious. Something that will be found unto praise, honour, and glory when Jesus appears.

Now, I want to address another hard question because some of you might be wondering, "If God loves me, if God cares about me, why does He not just take the suffering away? Why does He not just fix it? Why does He not intervene?" And that is a fair question. It really is. It is a question God's people have asked throughout history. It is a question I have asked myself.

But here is what I know. God absolutely could stop your suffering. He has the power. Nothing is too hard for Him. But sometimes His purposes are served better by carrying you through the suffering than by removing it. Paul experienced this. Scripture tells us where this happened. And Paul talks about how he had a thorn in his flesh. We do not know exactly what that was, but it was painful to Paul. It was burdensome. And Paul begged, begged God three times to remove it.

Let us look at 2 Corinthians 12:8-10, where Paul writes, "For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, or three times, that it might depart from me. And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee, my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly, therefore, will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore, I take pleasure in infirmities. I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake, for when I am weak, then I am strong."

Wow, that is very powerful. And think about how you can apply that verse to your life. I know some of you are going through some tough times. People have been cruel to you. You are dealing with physical infirmities, sicknesses. Your financial situation may not be all that great. There are all kinds of issues that plague everyone, including God's children.

Listen to what Paul says here. He says, "My grace is sufficient for you." God did not remove the thorn, but He gave Paul something far better. He gave him grace to endure it. He gave him strength in weakness, and Paul's response is remarkable. He says he will gladly glory in his infirmities. Can you say that? Could you say that you will glory in your infirmities? I have a difficult time saying that; I really do. But Paul, the apostle, he says he will do this. And why does he do that? So that the power of Christ may rest upon him. That is why.

When I am weak, then am I strong. That's the upside down mathematics of the kingdom of God. God's strength is most visible in our weakness. is powerful is most evident when we have nothing left. So if you're at the end of yourself right now, if you have nothing left to give, if you're completely depleted and exhausted and broken, well guess what? You're exactly where God may work most powerfully. Because when you're strong, when you have it all together, When you're managing fine on your own, it's easy to forget you need God. But when you're weak, when you're desperate, when you're clinging by a thread, when you have nowhere else to turn, that's when you learn to truly depend on Him. And that dependence, that desperate clinging to God, that's what He's been working toward all along.

Now, let me say something else that's important. When everything falls apart, when you're in the middle of suffering, your flesh, or even Satan, he'll use it against you and whisper lies in your ears. You might think that God doesn't love you. You might think you're being punished. you might think you're not really saved, because if you were, God wouldn't let this happen. That's an easy thing for us to think. But don't listen to those lies. Don't listen to them. They're lies, and they're not from God. God doesn't speak to his children that way.

And here's why those lies are false. Because if you're in Christ, you don't stand before God in your own righteousness. You stand in Christ's righteousness. His perfect obedience has been credited to you. His perfect life has been given to you. It's been imputed to you, as the theologians say.

2nd Corinthians chapter 5 verse 21 says, "For He hath made Him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him." Think about that exchange for a minute. Christ, who was sinless, He knew no sin, He was made sin for us. He took not just our sin and the condemnation that was owed to that sin, but He also took upon Himself our guilt. All of it was placed on Him, and what did we get in return? We were made the righteousness of God in Him. That's what the Bible clearly says. And that's not our own righteousness. That's God's righteousness. It's perfect. It's complete. It's unchanging. And it's been given to us, credited to us, to our account, imputed to us by faith. So, when God looks at you, if you're in Christ, He doesn't see your failures. He doesn't see your weaknesses. He doesn't see your sins. He sees Christ's righteousness. He sees Christ's perfection. He sees you clothed in the righteousness of His Son.

Romans 8 verses 38 and 39 tell us, "For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Nothing can separate you from God's love, not your suffering, not your circumstances, not your doubts, not your questions, not your weakness, not your failures, nothing, not a single thing, no circumstance, no power on earth or in heaven can separate you from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus.

And if you are in Christ, you are secure, you are loved, you are held, and nothing can change that. Because your security does not rest on your performance. It rests on Christ's finished work. So when Satan whispers that God has abandoned you, remember Romans 8. When he tells you God does not care, remember Isaiah 49. And when he says your suffering means God does not love you, remember the cross. Because the cross is the ultimate proof of God's love.

Romans 5 verse 8 says, "But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." While we were yet sinners, while we were his enemies, while we were rebellious and ungrateful and hostile toward him, Christ died for us. And if God loved you that much when you were his enemy, how much more does he love you now that you are his child? The cross proves God's love. It settles the question forever.

Romans chapter 8 verse 32 says, "He that spared not his own son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?" If God did not spare his son, but delivered him up for all of us, will he not also freely give us all things? If he gave us the greatest gift, the greatest gift of all time, in the entire universe for all eternity, his son, will he withhold anything else we truly need?

So, whatever you are going through right now, or will go through, or have gone through, whatever has fallen apart in your life, it is not because God does not love you. It is not because He is punishing you. It is not because He has abandoned you. He is right there with you. If you are in Christ, and you are in the darkness, and you are in pain, you have confusion, I will just tell you right now, He has not moved. He has not turned away.

1 Peter chapter 2, verse 24 reminds us, "He bore our sins in His own body on the tree." That is substitution. He took what was ours. He carried it. He suffered for it, and He died for it, so that we, being dead to sins, could live unto righteousness. By His stripes we were healed, not by our own works, not by our own suffering, not by our own righteousness. By His stripes, by His wounds, and by His blood.

Psalm 46, verse 1 says, "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." A very present help, not a distant help. Not an occasional help, but a present help. Right here, right now, in the middle of your trouble. And verse 10 says, "Be still and know that I am God." Be still. Stop striving. Stop trying to figure it all out. Stop demanding answers. Just be still and know that I am God. He is still God. He is still sovereign. He is still good. He is still faithful. He is still in control. And you might not understand what He is doing. You might not be able to see His purposes. But you can know that He is God. And that is enough.

So, let me close with this. If you are in the middle of suffering right now, if everything is falling apart, if you are asking, "Where is God?" Well, let me tell you where He is. He is right beside you. He is carrying you. He is holding you up when you do not have strength to stand. And He is providing grace for you this very moment. And He will provide grace for the next moment when it comes.

You do not have to have it all figured out. You do not have to understand why. And you do not have to be strong or brave or well put together. You just have to keep trusting. You have to keep clinging. Keep crying out to Him. Even when it feels like He is not listening. Even when it feels like He is far away. Because He is not far away. He is as close as your next breath.

And His mercies are new this morning, fresh grace for today, every day, sufficient strength for this hour. And remember, if you are in Christ, you are not standing on your own merit. You are not depending on your own righteousness. You are clothed in Christ's perfect righteousness, washed in His precious blood, secure in His finished work.

Hebrews 10:19-20 says, "Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way which he hath consecrated for us through the veil, that is to say, his flesh." By the blood of Jesus, that is how we have access to God and that is how we can come boldly. Not because we deserve it, not because we have earned it, but because of the blood of Christ.

And one day, when you see Him face to face, and you will, you will understand. You will see how He was working. You will see how He was weaving even the darkest threads into something beautiful. You will see that He never left you, never forsook you, never stopped loving you.

Until that day, all I can say to you is hold on. It is going to get bumpy. It is going to be a bumpy ride. It is going to be a roller coaster, but keep trusting, keep believing--not in your own strength, but because you do not have any strength. You know that. Trust in His strength, believe in Him, in His faithfulness, and in His unchanging love. He will see you through this--not because you are strong, but because He is. Not because you deserve it, but because He is merciful. Not because you have earned it, but because of grace. Because Christ died for His people. Because His blood was shed. Because His righteousness covers you. And that is the gospel. That is the good news.

Even in the darkest valley, God is with you. He will never, ever let you go. You do not belong to yourself. You were expensive. You were very expensive. You were bought with a price. That price was the precious blood of Christ. That blood is sufficient. That sacrifice is complete. That righteousness is yours forever.

That is all I have for you today. I hope this has brought you some comfort. That is what I aim for in most of my videos: for the people of God to have comfort. I want you to have some perspective, some hope, because that is what I wanted to give you: hope. Real hope. Biblical hope. Hope grounded in the character and promises of God and the finished work of Christ.

If you are struggling right now, if you need someone to talk to, reach out to me. There is a contact form in the description below. Just click on that link, go to my website, and fill out the form. I would be honored to hear from you and pray for you. I am willing to listen to you, to talk to you, either through the phone or email. I can promise you that anything you say to me will remain confidential.

I just want to help you, and that is all I have for today. So grace and peace to you. Good night.